General Discussions > Anything goes...
The Girl Thread (New Poll as of May 24th!)
Cherry-chan:
Hmm... my advice... well, I suppose the best you could do is be there for her. I was reading this pamphlet my mom had after my grandfather died (that's one of the moments where I've cried the hardest), and it said that saying "______ had gone to a better place" is not really the best thing to say to someone who's mourning. So, yeah, just be there for her, and when she's comfortable, she'll talk to you. Sometimes words don't mean as much as actions, ne? She'll most likely be glad that you were there for her the whole way while she was crying, sad, etc.
Gomen ne. This is the only advice I can give right now, since I'm really stressed and my worries have practically consumed me.
Monse-chan:
On the contrary, all your advice has helped me think and realise what isw better to do!
Thank you so much.... *huggles*
moezychan:
I don't think I could say anything to top what everyone else has already said. Best thing really is to just be there for her. Actions are far better than words.
LSD:
--- Quote from: Monse-chan on April 25 2006, 11:36 am ---Ano.... I need a bit of help from you, girls....
You see, I am bit confused, since one of my best friends lost someone that was dear to her... today she didn't come to school, and we were told by the teacher that there was going to be a funeral, and that if we were able, we could go to give her support in saying goodbye....
I didn't talk much with her, we were mostly hugging to each other the whole time.... but I am not sure how I can help her, or act now with her, while she is still in pain (the person passed away yesterday)
Can I get a bit of advice, onegai?
I am not sure she is coming tomorrow to school, but I wonder if I should call her, or leave her with her family? Until now I have only gone to the funeral but I haven´t actually TALKED with her.... and I am not sure what I should say.... :(
--- End quote ---
and whatever happens.. don't leave her alone!!!
once..my friends's mother died.. and we all went to her funeral.. and she was crying a lot (of curse).. we able to calm her a little, cuz she hadn't eat..and we just left like 30 secns..and a weird lazy was talking with her..i just went really fast to give her the food cuz i was burning my hands.. and then that stupid lady said "but don't worry..you mother didn't feel anything..her liver was destroyed in the accident and crashed in pieces after all" i was lke..*shut your mouth!!!*..and my friend cried again and said "how she couldn't feel anything..if a truck was above her*.. i wanted to slap that lady face in that moment T_T#..
In other occacion..one of my best friend..lost his boyfriend..he was murderer in the worst way you could imagine..she didn't went to school for 2days...i called her..but nobody aswered..i went to her house..but noody was there..i was started to get a little scary..
2 days latter she came to school..crying..and screaming.. she really suffured in that moment, cuz she just had an abort and was mouning her baby... i cried with her ;_; and didn't say anything..we were crying like for 5 hours...without talking..until she fell sleep next to me..
that was one of my sadest moments...
for me..as eveybody already said.. just hug her till she can't breath...and don't talk...sometimes silence is the best..but just hug her so she will feel that she is not alone.
and when she stops crying a little..talk with her about..ramdom things that won't make him remind that person in that moment..
moezychan:
Excellent advice Pretty-chan. Yeah I know, you have a new username, but I'll always call you that. Sometimes just being there is the best thing for her. Words usually tend to get in the way.
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