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The Official Wrestling Thread (now with more news and stuff)
Arcademan:
WWE RAW Results: 1-23-12
Results courtesy of PWTorch.com (direct link to Caldwell's complete report). Condensed here to in-ring results only.
1 -- WWE champion C.M. PUNK & JOHN CENA vs. U.S. champion JACK SWAGGER & DOLPH ZIGGLER (w/Vickie Guerrero)
Cena started things off before Punk tagged in for a basic exchange with Swagger. They came to a stalemate and Laurinaitis was shown texting or tweeting as they cut to break 1:30 in.
Back from break, Cena scored a close two count on Ziggler as Cole hyped Laurinaitis's decision-making. Ziggler and Cena then went back and forth on the ropes before Ziggler simply stopped, "showed off," and walked over to Swagger for a tag. Cena took it to Swagger, then did a Flair/Double J strut, only to take a blindside attack from Swagger. Ziggler and Swagger then worked over Cena as Punk reached out for a tag. Meanwhile, Cole re-referenced Mick Foley wanting a spot in the Royal Rumble, but Laurinaitis won't allow it.
Cena broke free at 9:40 and made the hot tag to Punk as Ziggler tagged in for the heels. Punk took it to Ziggler with signature offense before calling for the GTS. Ziggler escaped, though, only to eat a roundhouse kick to the head. Punk made a cover, but Swagger broke up the pin. Cena and Swagger then brawled to the outside, where they traded submission holds. Back in the ring, Punk slammed Ziggler and wanted to go up top, but the ref was in the way. Punk told him to move, then Laurinaitis hopped on the ring apron to reprimand Punk for moving the ref away. Punk then grabbed Laurinaitis, causing Laurinaitis to drop to the floor. Ziggler then rolled up Punk from behind and hooked his tights for the pin and the win.
WINNERS: Ziggler & Swagger at 11:09.
2 -- KANE vs. ZACK RYDER -- Falls Count Anywhere match
Ryder tried a pre-emptive attack, but Kane brushed it aside and knocked Ryder to the outside. Kane stalked Ryder and delivered knees to the gut, followed by strikes to the back. Kane continued the assault as Eve emerged ringside in the background. Eve called out to Zack, who ate the announce table. They cut to break with Ryder in trouble.
Back from break, Kane was toying with Ryder as Lawler implored Eve to get away from the action. Kane then applied his mandible claw-like maneuver to choke Ryder before letting go. Cole surmised Kane wants to continue torturing Ryder. Kane then flung Ryder over the guardrail into the front row area.
Cole noted Kane is sending a message to Cena ahead of the Rumble. The action moved to the intersection of the floor and bleacher seats next to the production area. Kane continued to focus on Ryder's injured mid-section before Ryder finally fought back, only to take an uppercut. Kane ripped off the tape around Ryder's mid-section, then dragged him toward the entrance stage. On the stage, Kane blasted Ryder into the base of the giant WWE logo. Kane followed with more knees to the gut, then made a cover, but Ryder kicked out. Cole wondered aloud if this is the smart move by Ryder.
The crowd tried to rally with a "Let's Go Ryder...woo woo woo-woo-woo" chant as Ryder sold near unconsciousness on the stage. Ryder suddenly fought back with strikes, but Kane decked him on the stage with an uppercut. Kane then gripped Ryder around the throat and delivered a chokeslam through a gimmicked portion of the stage. Eve immediately ran up the entrance ramp to the stage and tried looking down at Ryder before Kane stalked her down the ramp toward the ring. Kane looked over his shoulder as the ringside medic tried running around Kane to check on Ryder.
Kane suddenly turned around when he spotted John Cena on the entrance stage. Kane disappeared through the crowd as Cena and Eve looked through the hole in the stage to check on Ryder. Cena went back and forth between checking on Ryder and looking around for Kane before covering his mouth with his hand. The camera finally got a shot of the hole below the stage, where Ryder was selling unconsciousness. Ryder was placed on a backboard as Eve sold tears. Cena had a blank stare partly concerned for Ryder and partly selling fear over his possible Sunday night against Kane. They suddenly cut to break.
WINNER: No Contest at 13:35 when they cut to break. There was a lot of raw emotion in the crowd that Cena could turn into a babyface promo passionately vowing revenge on Kane at the PPV.
3 -- SHEAMUS vs. JINDER MAHAL
Sheamus quickly dismantled Mahal before Wade Barrett confidently strutted down to ringside sporting his big overcoat and dress clothes. Sheamus tried to ignore Barrett before blasting away at Mahal's chest with multiple strikes. Sheamus locked eyes with Barrett, then Mahal took the distraction as an opportunity to throw Sheamus off the top turnbuckle. Barrett hyped his Rumble chances as Mahal scored with offense on Sheamus. Barrett then turned his attention to Randy Orton, vowing to cripple Orton like Kane did to Ryder. In the ring, Sheamus made a comeback, then hit the Brogue Kick. Sheamus with the cover for the win.
WINNER: Sheamus at 3:12.
4 -- BRODUS CLAY vs. HEATH SLATER
The bell sounded and Slater ran into a shoulder tackle. Clay danced and jiggled as Regal brought his NXT style commentary to the match. Clay got upset when Slater tried offense, so Clay delivered a suplex and big corner splash. Clay followed with his "What the funk?" finisher before noting someone needs to call Slater's momma as he made the pin. Cue up the post-match dance celebration.
WINNER: Clay at 0:52. The crowd wasn't into Clay - booing or cheering - as much as past crowds. The audience seems to be waiting for Clay's re-introduction to go somewhere.
5 -- THE MIZ vs. R-TRUTH -- Loser gets #1 spot in Rumble
Miz dominated early on before knocking Truth to the outside. They cut to break two minutes in with Miz posing in the ring.
Back from break, Miz was still in control of the match. Truth fought back with knock-down clotheslines before rolling up Miz for a close two count. Truth followed with a pancake suplex for a nearfall, then Miz visibly called the next sequence of moves. Miz eventually teased the Skullcrushing Finale, but Truth blocked. Miz came back with a kneeling DDT for a two count. Miz nearly got himself DQ'ed, then walked into Truth's Little Jimmy finisher for the pin and the win. Miz gets the undesired #1 slot in the Rumble. Afterward, Truth left and Miz sold shock as he realized what just happened.
WINNER: Truth at 8:13.
Arcademan:
WWE NXT Results: 1-25-12
Results courtesy of PWTorch.com (direct link to James's complete report). Condensed here to in-ring results only.
1 - THE USOS vs. CURT HAWKINS & TYLER REKS - Tag Team Match
Hawkins and Jimmy start off. Jimmy elbows him down and tags in Jey, leading to a quick double-team for a one count. Reks blind tags in, but Jey outwits him. Jey keeps Hawkins out of the ring, letting Reks hit a big boot before tagging in Hawkins.
Reks and Hawkins run their isolation routine on Jey for a few minutes. Jey crotches Reks on the ropes and Regal says, "He's ruptured his custard." Double tag out and Jimmy cleans house on Hawkins. Stinkface, but Reks breaks up the pin. Reks and Jimmy brawl ringside, letting Hawkins set up some funky move. The ref is distracted by Jey, so Reks tosses the cane to Hawkins, but Jimmy lands a surprise superkick for the win.
WINNERS: The Usos in 7:00. Good match as expected, but the formula is starting to wear a little thin for a regular viewer like me. I've seen these two face off two many times lately.
2 - TRENT BARRETA vs. HEATH SLATER
Slater surprises Barreta with a fast punch to the face, but Barreta comes out of the corner with a chop and ends up clearly Slater from the ring. Slater suckers Barreta to the outside and starts up some offense. Slater rolls Barreta into the ring for a two count. Barreta can't get traction against Slater. Barreta finally turns things around, dodging a corner splash and landing a dropkick. Barreta with a big leaping elbow in the corner and the Gobstopper Knee for two.
Slater tries a Sunet Flip over the ropes, but Barreta catches him and bridges for a nearfall, neat sequence. Barreta gets up to the top rope but Slater jumps up to lands a powerslam in a snap for a close two count. Barreta tries an inside cradle for two. Slater shrugs off the Dudebuster DDT and lands his finisher for the win. (I haven't seen his finisher in over six months.)
WINNER: Heath Slater in 7:00. Well that was definitely the biggest surprise WWE's had in a while - a Heath Slater win?
3 - PERCY WATSON vs. TITUS O'NEIL
Watson starts off fast with quick offense capped by a running step-up enziguri. Watson continues the offense in the corner but O'Neil gets in a punch as the ref tries to break them apart. O'Neil dumps Watson from the ring and beats on him outside. O'Neil rolls Watson into the ring and covers for a one count. Regal makes an interesting statement, saying that he wrestled for money, and that people paid more money to see him get beat up, so he made more money.
O'Neil continues his assault and covers for two. Watson gets separation, but O'Neil dodges a splash in the corner and stomps away on Watson, which gets two. Watson can't get a break and O'Neil continues to dominate him. Watson gets a boot run, shoulder tackle, dropkick, corner splash, and another shoulder tackle to take O'Neil down. Watson with the Showtime Splash for two. O'Neil elbows out of a fireman's carry and picks Watson up for the Clash of the Titus mid-ring. It's good for a three count.
Post-match, O'Neil continues to beat up Watson. Alex Riley makes the save to a huge pop from the crowd.
WINNER: Titus O'Neil in 8:00. Effective match to get over Titus as a heel, but his offense isn't thrilling in large quantities. He needs some more sizzle with his steak.
Arcademan:
WWE Superstars Results: 1-26-12
Results courtesy of PWTorch.com (direct link to James's complete report).
1 - TYSON KIDD vs. JINDER MAHAL
Wait, who's the heel here? Are they perhaps turning Tyson Kidd face?
Mahal sends Kidd to the corner after an early lock-up. After the break, he mouths off. Kidd with a waistlock, but Mahal powers out as Matt Striker talks up Kidd's "dedicated following." Mahal with a wristlock, but Kidd springboards off the ropes and arm drags Mahal to escape. On the outside, Kidd with a cannonball roll off the apron and he hand slaps fans ringside. It's confirmed, this is a face turn for Kidd.
Back in the ring, Kidd gets a two count, but Mahal goes on the attack in the corner. Mahal gets a two count off a neckbreaker, then a butterly suplex for two. A few vocal males chant for Tyson Kidd as Mahal grounds him with a quarter nelson. Mahal uses knees to cut off a comeback, but Kidd transitions Mahal's suplex into a lateral press for two. Kidd armdrags while running the ropes and lands some kicks and a basement drop kick. Kidd uses speed to control Mahal, then does an innovative springboard reverse sunset flip into a cover for two. You had to see it to believe it.
Kidd dropkicks Mahal's knees out, then lands a springboard guillotine leg drop. Kidd to the top rope and tries a moonsault, but Mahal dodges and follows up with a slam to the ground. Mahal settles into the Camel Clutch and Kidd taps after a struggle.
WINNER: Jinder Mahal via submission in 6:00. Good match. Tyson Kidd is just stellar, and Mahal worked very well with him. I am a fan of Mahal's in-ring work, as I think he brings a good martial arts feel to the matches that sets him apart from the rest of the roster. I'm not sure if a full turn for Kidd means much since he was never a strong heel and his last face run was weak as well. Kidd is a perfect example of someone who could really benefit from a manager, valet, stable leader, etc. to act as a mouthpiece. His in-ring work is quite likely Top Five in WWE, but he just hasn't found his groove as a character to take him to the next level.
2 - BETH PHOENIX vs. BRIE BELLA (w/Nikki Bella)
Wow, Beth Phoenix still exists! Where has she been? What happened to "Pin-up Strong?" Is she still a heel? Pre-match, Scott Stanford talks up Beth Phoenix's crusade against the Barbie dolls, so I guess she is still a heel.
To start, Bella shoves Phoenix, so Phoenix shoves her down to the mat, and when Bella pops up, Phoenix levels her with a lariat. Phoenix with elbows, atomic drop, and a side slam for two. Phoenix with a corner splash, and when she tries to follow up with a splash on the ropes, Nikki pulls Brie out of the way, causing Phoenix to get tangled up and fall down. Bella with a bulldog and stomps to ground Phoenix. Bella chokes Phoenix on the ropes and covers for two. Bella tries to stomp Phoenix on the mat, but Phoenix catches the foot.
Phoenix with some power offense, but Bella with a neckbreaker for two. Bella with a rear chinlock and Phoenix calls to the crowd for help. Phoenix stands up with Bella on her back, rams her into the turnbuckle, and then sets up a slingshot suplex. Phoenix calls for the Glam Slam, but Nikki gets on the apron, so Phoenix shoves Brie into Nikki to clear her out, then when Brie bounces back, catches her and lands the Glam Slam for the win.
WINNER: Beth Phoenix in 3:00. Fun match. I think the Bella Twins are the only main roster Divas with a truly well defined character; others have it, but they aren't "main roster." Who doesn't love them some Beth Phoenix? WWE has a problem handling her character, because fans want to cheer a winner, and she's a dominant winner. Without letting her destroy the Divas division a la Mark Henry, WWE just can't keep her heel. Pretending she's just a monster face instead of a monster heel is a good choice, and would explain why she's been off TV for a while, to let fans forget "Pinup Strong."
3 - KOFI KINGSTON vs. MICHAEL MCGILLICUTTY
McGilicutty with an arm drag as the announcers noted that Kingston was McGillicutty's NXT Pro. McGillicutty still in control. Kingston trips McGillcutty and lands a standing senton splash that looked like a botched Boom Drop for a one count. Kingston with an armbar, but McGillicutty gets him to the corner. Kofi with an elbow to take control and a pendulum kick and a big crossbody gets two. Kingston with work on McGillicutty's arm. McGillcutty gets sent over the rope and Kingston ends up landing a suicide dive leading to break.
Kingston still in control back from the break, but McGillicutty turns it around with a neckbreaker through the ropes to get two. McGillicutty with more offense. Kingston finally turns things around with a kick to McGillicutty's head. After they recover, Kingston starts his usual comeback sequence. After a Boom Drop, Kingston looks for Trouble in Paradise, but McGillicutty ducks. McGillcutty tries a dropkick but Kingston sidesteps and knocks him to the mat.
Kingston with the SOS, but McGillicutty grabs the rope. McGillicutty hot shots Kingston on the rope and does the worst imitation of Edge's Spear warm-up I've ever seen. Kingston ducks his move and they trade counters and Kingston lands the Trouble in Paradise off the ropes for the win.
WINNER: Kofi Kingston in 11:00. Michael McGillicutty just does not put together interesting matches. He has potential, but he needs to internalize two major points. First, he is not big enough for a slow, plodding offense to be believable or create enough visual effect to let the audience ignore the slow pace. Secondly, he absolutely needs to develop some signature moves. The fact that his finisher is a fancy neckbreaker is symbolic of the fact that his skillset feels very "wrestling school 101" - punch, kick, dropkick, arm drag, and neckbreaker. He needs those trademark combos and signature moves for the audience to invest in his matches and see him as anything more than a generic face on the screen.
Arcademan:
WWE Royal Rumble PPV Results: 1-29-12 (next four posts)
Results courtesy of PWTorch.com (direct link to Caldwell's ongoing report).
1 -- World Hvt. champion DANIEL BRYAN vs. BIG SHOW vs. MARK HENRY -- World Title match -- steel cage match
Once the bell sounded, Bryan tried to escape, but the two big men yanked him down to the mat. Big Show then squished Henry in-between a cage wall and ropes with consecutive splashes. No, Henry did not fall out of the cage due to the "collapsing cage wall" gimmick. In the background, Bryan tried to run out, but Show grabbed him and landed a chop to the chest. Bryan avoided a WMD strike, but ate a cage wall from Henry. The two big men took turns trying to wear down Bryan while keeping the other at bay. Meanwhile, the announcers played up the Bryan/A.J. relationship.
Bryan suddenly came back with a DDT on Show, followed by a LeBell Lock. The crowd called for Show to escape, then Henry took care of it for Show with a kick to Bryan's head. Show suddenly KO Punched Henry, then made a cover, but Bryan made a desperation save. Bryan then tried a desperation escape to a strong reaction, but Show climbed to the top of the cage to grab Bryan. Show actually made it to a sitting position on top of the cage and tried to hold onto Bryan, but Bryan fell to the floor, winning the match.
Afterward, Bryan celebrated his "crafty" victory while Show remained stunned sitting on top of the cage. Bryan celebrated a bit longer before they cut to a replay of Show losing his grip on Bryan, leading to Bryan crashing to the floor to escape the cage and win the match. They went back to Show selling frustration and Bryan celebrating a World Series-like victory on the stage. PWTorch correspondent Michael Cupach noted Henry had to be helped to the back after the match due to his pre-existing injury.
WINNER: Bryan at 9:08 to retain the World Title. Fine opening match with good heat. The match appeared to be kept short due to Henry's limitations. (**)
2 -- Divas champion BETH PHOENIX & NATALYA & BELLA TWINS vs. KELLY KELLY & EVE & ALICIA FOX & TAMINA -- eight-Divas tag match
After the Cena video aired, Beth Phoenix's music played to bring out the heel Divas for an eight-Divas tag match. Kelly Kelly's music then brought out the face Divas, including Eve, who was selling concern over Zack Ryder's condition from Raw. On cue, the match settled into the heels wearing down a "distracted" Eve. Fox, then Kelly Kelly took hot tags and the action broke down, then spilled to the outside. Kelly got her shine with a big splash onto everyone. But, back in the ring, Beth nailed the Glam Slam on Kelly for the win.
WINNERS: Team Phoenix at 5:29.
3 -- JOHN CENA vs. KANE
Once the bell sounded, Cena tried to blast away with right hands to make this look like a fight more than a match. The crowd picked up a loud dueling chant that was heavy on "Cena Sucks" versus "Let's Go Cena." The match moved to the floor, where Cena rammed Kane into the guardrail. Kane sold a right knee injury before limping back into the ring. Cena immediately went for the Attitude Adjustment, but Kane fell on top of his back. Kane then went to work on Cena, trying to wear him down.
Cena found an opening with a drop toe hold, then went for a bulldog, but Kane flung him away into the ropes. Kane then ran over Cena with a big clothesline before Kane peered down at his hand, as if to sell he was thinking about his mandible claw-like maneuver. Kane tried the un-named mouth-stuffer, but Cena blocked. Suddenly, Cena transitioned into the STF center-ring. Kane flung him away, though, and dropped Cena with a sidewalk slam.
Next, Kane set up for and connected with a top-rope clothesline. Kane then measured Cena for a chokeslam, but Cena ducked and delivered a sit-out slam. Cena then called for the Five Knuckle Shuffle to loud boos, but Kane blocked the You Can't See Me part with a chokeslam tease. Cena escaped, but ate a big boot to the face. Kane made a cover, but Cena kicked out. The match moved up-top, where Cena blocked a superplex before connecting with a top-rope Five Knuckle Shuffle fist drop. Cena then wanted the AA, but Kane emphatically elbowed out before tossing Cena to the outside.
On the outside, Kane landed right hand blows as the referee applied a ten count in the background. As expected, the fight continued ringside with Kane ignoring the referee. Kane and Cena continued to brawl after the bell rang for a double count-out, then Cena blasted Kane with a portable light fixture along the entrance ramp. The fight moved to the stage area, then to the production area.
The fight spilled backstage, where Cena threw Kane into a row of trash cans. Kane went underneath a table, though, and retrieved a chair to jab into Cena's mid-section. Cena took a chair shot across the back, then another. Kane wasn't done, though, as he spotted Zack Ryder's locker room. He kicked down the flimsy door, finding Ryder alone in his wheelchair. Kane tried choking Ryder with his mandible claw before wheeling Ryder out of the locker room, past Cena. Kane scared away stagehands before wheeling Ryder back into the arena area. The cameras picked up Kane wheeling Ryder down the entrance ramp before throwing him out of the chair on the ground.
Kane flung Ryder into the ring, then Eve suddenly jogged into the ring. Eve begged Kane to have mercy on Ryder, but Kane lifted up Ryder and delivered a Tombstone Piledriver for a nostalgia pop. Eve covered her mouth and sold tears before Kane turned toward Eve. Suddenly, Cena re-emerged and charged the ring to blast away at Kane. He tried an AA, but sold a back injury. Kane then chokeslammed Cena mid-ring. Eve was left alone, but Kane decided his work was done and left the ring. Kane's music played and he disappeared to the back as Eve checked on a fallen Ryder.
Kane's music stopped, then referees, Eve, and WWE's ringside doctor were shown checking on Ryder. They went to a replay of Kane's destruction before returning to the ring, where Ryder was placed on a stretcher as Eve cried. In the background, Cena recovered as he watched Ryder being placed on a backboard. Booker solemnly said this could be the end of Ryder's career. A light "Cena Sucks" chant could be heard. WWE then faded to a BA STAR video package.
WINNER: Double count-out at 10:56. This was more of a match than expected, but the non-finish was expected. Clearly, the Cena-Kane feud will continue on TV until they hit the big WM28 hype.
Arcademan:
4 -- BRODUS CLAY vs. DREW MCINTYRE
"Funk-a-sauras" chant when the bell sounded. Clay shook and jiggled to intimidate McIntrye, but Mac nailed him with strikes to drive Clay to the corner. Clay started to "Jiggle Up," though, and delivered his signature offense before nailing his "What The Funk?" finisher for the win. Cue up Clay and Funkettes with a post-match celebration.
WINNER: Clay at 1:05. Well, there you go.
5 -- WWE champion C.M. PUNK vs. DOLPH ZIGGLER -- WWE Title match -- John Laurinaitis ringside enforcer
Once the bell sounded, Cole accused Booker of being jealous of Laurinaitis dating back to WCW and said Laurinaitis was a better "worker" than Booker. As for the match, Ziggler "showed off" early on, drawing a smirk from Punk. Punk tried a quick submission afterward, but Ziggler escaped to the ropes. Punk then knocked Ziggler to the outside and landed a suicide dive. Back in the ring, Ziggler cut off Punk and began wearing down the champ. Ziggler stalked Punk for a Fameasser, but Punk countered with a nice spinning sit-out powerbomb for a close two count.
The match reset with Punk landing a chop to the chest, then right hand strikes. Punk followed with a corner knee and running bulldog before calling for the GTS. Punk set up for his finisher, but Ziggler elbowed out. Ziggler and Punk then traded holds before Punk grazed Ziggler with a kick to the head for a two count.
Punk followed with a top-rope Macho Man elbow drop, but Ziggler kicked out in time. "Randy Savage" chant from the crowd, then the ref was bumped out of the ring. Laurinaitis tried checking on the ref ringside while Punk and Ziggler battled in the ring. Punk locked in his submission finisher and Ziggler tapped out, but there was no ref. Punk then released the hold and yelled at Laurinaitis, who said he's helping the ref. Punk then scored a visual three count, but still no ref. Laurinaitis dragged the ref back into the ring, then Laurinaitis took a kick to the head as Punk hoisted Ziggler into position for the GTS. Punk delivered the GTS again, then scored another visual three count. Punk argued with Laurinaitis, telling him he had the match won three times. Punk went for the GTS again, but Ziggler countered with a mid-air Zig-Zag. He made a cover, but Punk kicked out just in time of the ref's three count, drawing a big reaction for the nearfall. Ringside, Laurinaitis sold frustration.
Ziggler tried to follow up with right hands, but Punk scored with a catapult that sent Ziggler flying into the top turnbuckle. Punk followed up with the GTS and Punk made a cover. The ref began his count, Laurinaitis slid into the ring, and both men counted to three, giving Punk the win. The announcers debated whether Laurinaitis did that simply to keep his job tomorrow night or whether he's really a good man. They went to a replay of the various visual falls for Punk, Ziggler's close pin attempt, and Punk's eventual victory. Back live, Punk was shown sitting down in the ring with his title belt. On the stage, Laurinaitis flashed a smile and applauded.
WINNER: Punk at 14:32 to retain the WWE Title. Below expectations in terms of match length and reaching "show-stealing level" Punk and Ziggler talked about in interviews ahead of time. The match story involving Punk and Laurinaitis fit the TV build-up, but didn't feel like a PPV match. Ziggler essentially taking four losses shows where he stands in this program. PWTorch columnist Greg Parks pointed out in a tweet, "So, Ziggler had four wins over Punk coming into this one, and Punk had four pinfalls in that match. Even-steven." (**1/2)
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